After I posted about my "miraculous" encounter with the library, Rich noted that such things only ever seem to happen to me. Everyone—spouses, parents, readers, and co-panelists—agrees: I attract the absurd.
But sometimes I suspect people think I invent these absurd situations in order to drive up traffic. Who else could [insert all that I've endured] in so short a time-frame? To be frank: sometimes I think I make it all up. So it doesn't hurt to have evidence my insanity's not imagined.
Proof in point: this letter I received from the library today, scanned for your convenience:
Words fail me.