The Best of Acephalous 2007

Chronology Be Damned, That Which Is Not To Be Missed:

• How to remove a ring stuck on your finger.
• This hard work, it frightens then crushes me.
• That damnable Library.
• Further damnation.
• The Ur-Troll.

January

• Writing about talking about blogging.
• Imitating Montaigne.
• Helping out.
• Irritation.

February

• Teeth.
• In a book.
• Something from that probably.
• Unexamined "the."
• Cerebus, Cerebus, conservatives, Cerebus.

March

• Uncomfortably redacted (in verse).
• PROFANITY.
• Cerebus, conservatives.
• n+anger.
• Have system, will profit.

April

• Michel, Michel, from whence craig.
• Help!  Stop!  Policing!
• Purpose.

May

• Picketing.
• Lawyers win.
• Talking pictures.

June

• Iceberg?
• Uh-oh.  Like, seriously.   Is he insane?  (Yes.)  (This one too.)  (And him.)  (This one?  A good egg.)
• Boobs from nothing.
• WHARTON!
• More lawyers winning.
• Him?  No way.
• Reader-generated content.
• Headless Lenin speaks, dances.

July

• Cute bunnies avoid terrible violence.
• The many faces of Hillary Clinton.
• Who is to be breaking up with whom in a parking lot?
• Enthusiastic banging inside [his] skull.
• Emily Dickinson did it.
• "It was only then, on the night before we shipped out to Iraq, as I reviewed my troops that I would be leading into battle, that I began to have doubts about the declining standards of the National Guard. Yes, we hit the enrollment targets, sure. But with what sort of men? A guy so inordinately proud of his chest bush that he refused to wear his fatigues, an ape from the San Diego zoo, a Star Wars nut who was scared to appear in public without his R2D2 getup, and an illegal Mexican wrestler who went by 'el vaquero secreto'? It was, in short, the moment when I should have known that les jeux sont faits. We were well and truly fucked." [via CR]

August

• How to win your heart into hot undergrads pants.
• Obama has always already won the nomination.
• Now we elect the MAYOR OF SEXYTOWN.
• Cookies!

September

• My suicide attempt.
• Violations of listserv etiquette.
• Egregious violations of listserv etiquette.
• Work Bird sees your thumbs twiddling.
• I'm less mad about you than enraged at you.
• The wheat.  Adam Roberts loves the wheat.
• Self-referential wormhole.
• Pity poor David Duke.
• Minority literature?  Scum on the barrel bottom's blistered backside.
• Behave!

October

• O to strangle that nagging feeling!
• I am (not) becoming intimidating.
• Uppity little snots be damned.
• Don't be an asshole.
• I dream the lameness heroic.
• All ur functions r under erasure.
• Learn to format.

November

• Everybody come laugh at the doofus.
• Springsteen in the classroom?
• "MY NAME IS EXOTIC TO YOU. By Exotic To You. (Smith, Johnson, White and Smith, $25) This is a powerful book about a powerful brown person who lives a powerful life in America."
• Who chooses whom again?
• The Munch Paradox.

December

• Why you won't deserve the job you land.
• Why I won't deserve the job I land.
• Liberal Fascism: two words next to each other.
• Foster Wallace's future of politics and advertisement.
• How SEK hid cancer from his wife.
• "I have been bested," SEK said.  "Commence my hilarious penance."

The third installment wasn't divided by months.  This one is because I'd half-finished a version of it earlier and besides variety is the spice of life.  There's also some overlap with the second installment here, because I wasn't organizing by years the first two times.  I'll sort it all out soon enough though.  (Also, you may notice some slight alterations on the posts linked in the "Best of" series.  That's because I figure these are the ones strangers will read and I want to make sure they don't mistake me for an Yglesias or a Klein.)

Comments

[Martin Wisse]

If nothing else I learned two things from this. One, that you're a Springsteen fanboy (good) and two, you're two years younger than me (less good).

[SEK]

What, do I write old? Do these jeans make me look fat? When did I stop beating my wife!?!