A parable

It's fourth down and seven with two outs in the bottom of the ninth of the Super Bowl of Sport. COACH ROMNEY calls a timeout.

COACH ROMNEY: Brees, I'm going to have to take you out.

DREW BREES: Why Coach? I'm just about throw a strike-out on the winning drive!

COACH ROMNEY: I know you throw your throws at the appropriate height, but this is just too important. We need to be winning this sport.

DREW BREES: But I am winning it!

COACH ROMNEY: I mean we need to be winning it. (Sends BREES to the bench and signals to the bullpen. Enter TIM TEBOW.) I trust you know what to do with this.

TIM TEBOW: Run it to left outfield for a touchdown!

COACH ROMNEY: Exactly. Let's go win this sport!

TIM TEBOW: Jesus Christ!

JESUS CHRIST: I want no part in this.

COACH ROMNEY: Of course you do. You're our new power forward!

JESUS CHRIST: Jesus Christ.

TIM TEBOW: Jesus Christ!

How will the World Series of Sport end? I don't know either. But I guarantee it'll be entertaining.

Comments

[Ahistoricality]

BTW, I'm no Charlie Sheen fan, but if *someone* (SNL?) doesn't cast him as R-Money before this is all over, Western Civilization is lost.