Anyone wanna pay me $1,000,000 to produce a video of Obama choking on a matzo ball?

All I had to do was dither around the site to which I'd already linked to find evidence that my prediction about the next two months is correct. Because as it turns out I somehow missed this:

Breitbart News is doubling its reward—to $100,000—for one of the missing pieces of Barack Obama’s past, which may be the key to understanding his collapsing Middle East policy: the “Khalidi tape,” a video kept under wraps by the Los Angeles Times since April 2008.

The Khalidi tape shows Obama at a 2003 farewell party for radical Palestinian academic and activist Rashid Khalidi, and reportedly features vitriolic anti-Israel rhetoric ...

The ties between Obama and Khalidi are deep, going back to the days when Obama served on the board of the Woods Fund with former terrorist Bill Ayers, and provided funds for Khalidi’s Arab American Action Network ...

Given Obama’s muted response to the attacks on U.S. embassies and troops throughout the Middle East today; his refusal to meet with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu next week; his eagerness to sacrifice Americans’ free speech rights in fruitless gestures of appeasement; and his belated but effusive support for the now-radicalized Arab Spring, it is worth examining the roots of his misguided foreign policy.

The Khalidi tape may provide the key.

I'm pleased to introduce you to The New New Stupid, son of The New Stupid, inevitable father to the host of Newer Stupids due to arrive in the next two months. When FOX decided to blanket itself in that 1998 video of Obama discussing taxation as an anodyne form of redistributing wealth, all I could think was that someone in management thought tit-for-tat the most effective strategy to counter the release of the Romney video.* If they have videos, I imagined management saying, we will too. Put aside the fact that FOX claims to be an independent news organization and focus on the fact that executives at FOX believe that "video" is a unit, and that the only way to counter one unit of "video" is with another.

Breitbart News, so named because it decided to call itself that, literally doubled-down today in an attempt to produce a unit of "video" that will damage Obama's candidacy more than Romney's did his. This video, if it exists, will do maximal damage because it'll introduce Breitbart News readers and FOX viewers to shocking new ideas like "Obama has Muslim sympathies," "Obama hates Israel" and "Obama pals around with terrorists." As I noted in my previous post, the problem with this approach is that anyone who's going to believe that already does, so finding a unit of "video" that can be edited to demonstrate Obama's long-standing loathing of America and gefilte fish will have absolutely no impact on the election.

Yet it's incredibly important to conservative "news" outlets to find and disseminate as many of these units as they can between now and November. I would say that I don't know why, but I know that sucking at the conservative teat requires bona fides and that all these folks need them lest they be forced to leave the house and find a job that doesn't consist of shaming people who already have one.

*I also thought that "blanket coverage" made for an apt metaphor: FOX management ducked under the covers because thunder had thundered or monsters had crept from beneath the bed or Romney had opened his mouth.

Comments

[Jprs]

Funny how they give those Arab terrorists endowed chairs at Columbia...

[SEK]

In fairness, I'm assuming they forced this one to retire because, you know, because.

[Jprs]

No, he left the position at Chicago because of the offer from Columbia.

[SEK]

Which he subsequently blew up, in an explosion of great force and impact, therefore proving he's a terrorist. Yes, I understand exactly.

[Jprs]

But clearly that was taqiyya so he could get on the Council on Foreign Relations and be booked as a frequent guest on the O'Reilly Factor. Seriously? Did Breitbart even think beyond just seeing the foreign name and guessing it must be some nameless Ayrab terrist?

[SEK]

Did Breitbart even think beyond ...

... no. Unequivocally no.

[Sfc Mac]

He's more likely to choke on a shawarma.