One Vicious Whinge . . .

. . . can be found below the fold. 

I really need to take a deep breath and just not post some nights.

I want to thank everyone who inquired about my health and sanity after yesterday's post.  Yesterday was one of those days which feints split fingers to your eyes only to land solid a knee in regions sunless and tender. 

Terrible beyond the telling it was. 

If I were within ICBM range of "normal" I could've shook it off with a thought.  But I haven't slept soundly in over week because the drugs don't work anymore. 

No not those drugs. 

I'm no user. 

I'm a generic-thyroid-hormone-replacement-drug abuser.

So if I sent you the email which confirmed your suspicion that I'm an unreliable drunk please reconsider.  I'm no drunk.  I'm in remission.  (Maybe one day the doctors will tell me when one's cancer ceases its remission and I can be declared healthy again.  I want my bona fides back.)

So no real post tonight.  I composed silly thing in which I replaced all the books on my desk with slight variations such that V For Vendetta became "Hey there Henrietta!" and Mervyn Peake "Heard 'Em Speak."  But I've decided to spare you that disaster for the time being. 

So instead I'll treat you to the song which has had me in tears for days now.  [The first person to remind me that my thyroid currently has undue influence over my emotions wins a swift kick to their very vulnerable shins.]  Kevin's been posting about music of late and I feel left out.  No more!  I too am enamoured of the new Flaming Lips album and saddened by Grandaddy's demise—not to mention the other thing mentioned in that post that I'm still too choked up to comment on—but I wanted to share some Vanderslice with the masses.  His brilliance is underappreciated and I aim to rectify that situation.  So here is some [caution this link'll activate your default .mp3 player] vintage Vanderslice. 

It's called "Angela" but the song's more about the bunny than the bird.  (Had I not been reading the Moore this afternoon "the bird" would never have entered my mind as appropriate.  'Cause it ain't.  But it's awesomely alliterative so I left it there.  Yes this is all an elaborate pun.  I'd be less cryptic but I'm juiced like newly discovered Nabokov tonight.)  This'd be the perfect moment to explain everything to everyone . . . but I refrain for fear of factors constraining and formulaic.  More tomorrow.  'Cause those pins and needles fail to press significantly enough to feel.  I get it. 

I'm a loser.

Baby.

So why don't you kill me. 

[Answer: I don't want to die.  If I did I had myself opportunity enough.]

Comments

[Jamie Disaster (formerly Bodie)]

Wishing you better days, and longer sleeps. Since you've inspired me to invest in the new Flaming Lips c.d. I'm inclined to suggest something for you, the new Cat Power to relax to and sink into.

[Sour Duck]

I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope you feel better soon.

BTW, the new Grandaddy album is not as good as the previous ones, so lower your expectations and then you won't be so disappointed...

[Kevin Andre Elliott]

Wishing you all the best. Hang in there, my friend, and remember that "without music, life would be a mistake."

I second the Cat Power recommendation. It threw me by surprise at first, but after a few listens, I was enamored.

[Dr. Virago]

I really dug that Vanderslice tune -- thanks for linking that! And thanks for the heads up on the Lips new CD. Can't wait to buy it. I am *still* madly in love with Yoshimi -- can't live without it.

I hope you are feeling better soon and sleeping better soon, too (they go hand in hand, the feeling and the sleeping, don't they?).

[K]

I'm sorry you are feeling poorly, but it's my first time visiting and I think you're a great writer.

Hope it all gets better soon...

[helmut]

You mean you don't always post like the previous one? That's the one that got me to put you on my blogroll.

All the best.

[MT]

I think your thyroid may be deficient for irony. That bunny ballad....Never mind: Take two tunes of Jonathan Richman and call me in the morning.