Wednesday, 21 May 2008

No Actual Students were Harmed in the Composition of this Post The plot of this blog post is about why I have not been posting and I am writing it like this because my wife, to whom I am married, is currently grading papers. She uses the adjective "excellent" to describe the papers to me. It is a descriptive word. Its description is emotional and resonates to people who have emotions. The reason I have not been blogging, which I mentioned earlier is crucial to the plot of this blog post, is for many reasons. The first reason is that I have been watching my iRobot Roomba vacuum the apartment. Although it is supposed to be a time-saving device, many experts believe that the time people waste watching an iRobot Roomba vacuum an apartment eliminates the function of its time-saving. The second reason I have not been blogging is because I have been exercising. According to the government agency called the National Institute of Health in a book with the title Energize Yourself! Stay Physically Active, it is important to stay physically active because physical activity: can make you feel more energetic can help you lose weight and control your appetite help you sleep better Other benefits include: lower your chance for diabetes lower your chance for a stroke lower your blood pressure The National Institute of Health is from the government and a reliable source. Therefore I believe and trust them because they are trustworthy. Exercise and physical activity are a good thing and I am doing them instead of blogging. The third and final reason that I am not blogging is because I hate Mark Twain. Mark Twain was an American writer in the last century. His many books, which include masterpieces like Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer, are called masterpieces by the experts in literature who read them. Mark Twain is also a rat-bastard who spins gleefully in his grave every time a scholar tries to figure out the racial politics of Pudd'nhead Wilson. This is the third and last of the three reasons I have not been blogging.

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